Take a Second

Last night I was feeling wrapped up in all that life was throwing at me and I was pulling a classic Noons driving around listening to sad music with my windows down. I went home and sat on the roof (sorry, mom) and journaled for a bit when Molly came out and we just had the best conversation.

Life is moving so fast. I know that everyone says this and people hear it and know it but if you really take a second and let it resonate it can seriously freak you out! It feels like just yesterday I thought it was crazy that some of my older guy friends were going to high school-how grown up of them! Somehow I'm a junior in college and somehow this time next year I'm supposed to have at least a general idea of what I'm going to do with my life. How did I get here?

More than once in my life did I think I had it figured out. I became comfortable where I was and who I was surrounded by and accepted the state I was in as my life. For some reason I kept being completely incorrect and always ended up heartbroken at my collapsing plans. "Some of life's wildest journeys begin with a wrong turn."

Molls and I talked for a long time about how strange it is that some of our great friends right now could possibly be moving away this spring and there's a chance we will never see them ever again. What the hell do you do with that information? I'm so comfortable here with my support system, my established friends and environment, how will I adapt when it all changes yet again? How does everything change so much and in so little time?

But I think that's the beauty of being young. The littlest change can dictate the entirety of the rest of your life and how you adapt and mold yourself to that creates the person you end up being. At this point in our life, our world changes faster than the temperature just did (okay I swear I just pulled out all my winter clothes and now I'm wearing a tank top?). But the ever-changing environment brings along a ridiculous amount of opportunities. We can be whoever we want to be right now. We can reinvent ourselves at any minute.

I'm trying to learn to appreciate the quick evolution of my life right now. Recognizing how fast life moves has helped me to prioritize who and what is important to me. There's no need to waste precious breath or time on things that don't make you ecstatic and in love with life. There is no time to be stuck somewhere.

I have no idea what I'm doing most of the time but I am honestly okay with that. Something tells me that now is the time for me to be running around with my head cut off in confusion because eventually everything really is going to work out. I like organization and plans and schedules but something tells me that I have plenty of time to have permanent arrangements.

So it's okay to not have a clue because things change so fast right now that the amount of good that could potentially come your way is near infinite. It's moving so fast that we really need to stop for a moment to take it all in. When you're tucked into bed feeling a little lonely with your twinkle lights on, throw on Bon Iver's new album, grab a glass of wine, and laugh at how sporadic your life is. I know that where I am right now is the version of myself that I will smile about in ten years and say, "Oh, I just had no idea what was coming for me."  Enjoy your fast paced and random life because going to a Sammy Adams concert on a Tuesday night or going to McDonald's for fries and Diet Coke's at 1 am on a Wednesday probably won't be an option for much longer. Take a breath and appreciate these moments with your friends and environment. Take a second to enjoy the ride.