When I was younger, it seemed as though I could not sit still throughout the entirety of the month of December. Christmas was so magical and everything seemed to sparkle with the joy of the season. My siblings and I would all sleep in one room on Christmas Eve and I was lucky to get 20 minutes of actual sleep during the night. In the weeks leading up to Christmas, we would even have trial tests to see who could be the quietest person to sneak out of the room and tip-toe down the stairs to retrieve a present for each of us to play with until 4:30 or 5 am, depending on our parent's time allowance that year. Nothing could go wrong in December because the house was decorated better than a catalog (shout-out to Jan) and Santa was on his way. It doesn't hurt that the holiday practically revolves around cookies and hot chocolate as well.
Nearing the end of finals week this year, I continuously found myself mentally noting how depressing Christmas is now. Going home can mean boredom, nights away from friends and downtown, and parents getting on your case about one thing or the other. Going home can bring back memories and might even mean seeing people you don't particularly desire to see. Returning to your hometown can sometimes feel like you're stepping back into the past and that is not always easy or enjoyable for a lot of people. Let's also not forget the many questions about why you do not have a boyfriend to bring along to family gatherings, family members can ask the hardest questions.
People need to stop thinking like this. I am disappointed that I even thought of seeing Christmas as a depressing time of year. This mindset all changed when all of my siblings were home and my whole family gathered around in the living room, sharing stories and drinks, laughing about our misfortune and current events. It changed when I saw how grateful my mother was for helping her with decorations. It changed when my father's only birthday request was for all of us to go to a movie together. The magic of Christmas does not fade away as you grow, it simply changes forms.
Sure, after a while with your family you might need to have some alone time or a girl's night with your high school friends, but do not shut family time out completely. Over break, I have realized that coming home and laughing with my family has given me the opportunity to return to that childlike state. I have been able to return to all of the glories of living at home if only for a brief few weeks. At home, someone cooks you meals (or at least buys them for you), someone cleans for you, someone does your laundry, someone takes you to a movie or some other form of entertainment, someone notices when your head is stuck in the past and memories back home start coming out of the shadows.
So enjoy being home, young adults. It's a month of no school work, a month of clean clothes and delicious meals. Enjoy being over-loved and try to take some of that love back with you in January. Be nice to your parents because they think and worry about us more than we can fathom. Hang out with your siblings, quit watching Netflix and read a book, smile when a family member asks you an impossible question about your future. Enjoy returning to your childhood when life was a little easier and a lot less complicated. Find the magic of Christmas break because if you just have an open mind, I promise it will be right in front of you.
Life is Worth Living
Monday, December 7, 2015
"Life is worth living."
Today marks one week, seven days, 168 hours since the Earth stood still for a moment for me. It's been seven days of this churning pit in my stomach that makes me feel like I'm going to get sick any moment. Seven days of crying at inappropriate times in inappropriate places, but mostly seven days of not wanting to get out of bed in the morning. This week will easily go down as one of the hardest in my life.
I didn't really expect I would ever have a blog post inspired by a Justin Bieber song but here I sit on the floor, drinking coffee and listening to this song that has been on repeat for a few days now. In the midst of terrible heartbreak and feeling as though it is yours to handle on your own, I know I have to keep playing this song.
This week I am giving myself the challenge of thinking about all of the plans I have and then letting them go. There are many things I want to do but I also know that clearly sometimes the plan God has for you is greater than the one in your head. I'm going to travel, create, learn, and find purpose, but on God's schedule. I asked him to give me a sign and though it was a painful one, I got what I asked for. Obviously, God has a better idea for me than the one I had planned for myself and that is never easy to hear when you're sitting on the in-between.
But for now, I am trying to remember that none of the plans that are ahead of me will happen if I don't get out of bed in the morning. None of the big events coming up will be given the chance to come into my life unless I am out there in the world and trying. I cannot experience the gifts of the future until I let go of the past. Of course, all of these things are easier said than done and this knowledge doesn't take the pain away. However, I do truly believe it's always darkest before the dawn and that I have the power to really do something great in this world. I don't believe I've found my niche, my passion yet, but I never will unless I work on it. I know that great success comes with hard work and a lot of it is work in very difficult situations, but work that has to be done.
I hope that every person reading this that has a hard time getting out of bed to face the world remembers that every step you take into the pain is a step further from getting better. Every step back towards the past is just that, a step backwards and away from the future. Be aware of the pain in people around you because there are so many people out there hurting every day and most of them are hurting alone. I promise you will find the reason to make life worth living again.
Special shout-out to Jan for listening to me talk for hours and spending all of yesterday at my house helping me clean and decorate the house for Christmas. It was a way to start this week off on a completely different and hopeful note. There are people to help us find the reason to make life worth living again and that is the greatest gift.
So get out of bed, people. I know it hurts but it will be worth living.
Today marks one week, seven days, 168 hours since the Earth stood still for a moment for me. It's been seven days of this churning pit in my stomach that makes me feel like I'm going to get sick any moment. Seven days of crying at inappropriate times in inappropriate places, but mostly seven days of not wanting to get out of bed in the morning. This week will easily go down as one of the hardest in my life.
I didn't really expect I would ever have a blog post inspired by a Justin Bieber song but here I sit on the floor, drinking coffee and listening to this song that has been on repeat for a few days now. In the midst of terrible heartbreak and feeling as though it is yours to handle on your own, I know I have to keep playing this song.
This week I am giving myself the challenge of thinking about all of the plans I have and then letting them go. There are many things I want to do but I also know that clearly sometimes the plan God has for you is greater than the one in your head. I'm going to travel, create, learn, and find purpose, but on God's schedule. I asked him to give me a sign and though it was a painful one, I got what I asked for. Obviously, God has a better idea for me than the one I had planned for myself and that is never easy to hear when you're sitting on the in-between.
But for now, I am trying to remember that none of the plans that are ahead of me will happen if I don't get out of bed in the morning. None of the big events coming up will be given the chance to come into my life unless I am out there in the world and trying. I cannot experience the gifts of the future until I let go of the past. Of course, all of these things are easier said than done and this knowledge doesn't take the pain away. However, I do truly believe it's always darkest before the dawn and that I have the power to really do something great in this world. I don't believe I've found my niche, my passion yet, but I never will unless I work on it. I know that great success comes with hard work and a lot of it is work in very difficult situations, but work that has to be done.
I hope that every person reading this that has a hard time getting out of bed to face the world remembers that every step you take into the pain is a step further from getting better. Every step back towards the past is just that, a step backwards and away from the future. Be aware of the pain in people around you because there are so many people out there hurting every day and most of them are hurting alone. I promise you will find the reason to make life worth living again.
Special shout-out to Jan for listening to me talk for hours and spending all of yesterday at my house helping me clean and decorate the house for Christmas. It was a way to start this week off on a completely different and hopeful note. There are people to help us find the reason to make life worth living again and that is the greatest gift.
So get out of bed, people. I know it hurts but it will be worth living.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
