Complexity of Happiness

Whew! I believe this is the longest I have ever gone without posting and for that I am very sorry but it has been quite the whirlwind lately and for that I am so grateful. On Friday, I returned home from a spring break vacation in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic and have had the whole Big Red House to myself since. The quiet downtime has given me an opportunity to reflect on life as of recently and here's what I have come up with:

I am so inexplicably happy. I was walking home from class last Friday as break was officially beginning, it was about 60 degrees, I had just finished an exam I felt very good about, my favorite band had just released a new album, I was off to have lunch with my sister and then to see my family in order to travel to a tropical location. You know those moments when you honest to God feel as though you are going to burst because you aren't sure if it's scientifically possible for you to be full of any more happiness? I was squealing my whole walk home. I'm not sure I've ever been happier in a moment and I think I finally am understanding the secret to all of it: I made the happiness myself.

I recently started a new internship at Converge Consulting and I am so absolutely in love with it. I applied and interviewed for this job myself, I made the decision and the measures to qualify myself and here I am. I also started volunteering with an organization called Girls on the Run. I am surprised and humbled every time I am with these girls at how much of an impact positivity and support can make on the hardships of being a young girl. I'm hanging out with amazing people, I am working my butt off in school and seeing it pay off never gets old. I'm taking time to be alone and do things for myself. Every single day I make a choice for the next 24 hours to be great and focused on all of the little things that make my heart flutter. It isn't always easy of course, sometimes memories or stress of school catch up to me, but these instances are occurring so much less frequently.

This overwhelming happiness is not here because of another person or a happenstance of fate. I tried, I fought, I worked towards things that I knew were going to make me happy and made the constant choice of looking towards the good and forgetting about the bad. Doing this on my own has made it so much sweeter than I can explain. How can I ever be taken down by outside forces when I now know that I am the master of the way I feel. Life is unreal and I get to choose to see it as so.

Choose happiness, beautiful people.